Budgeting for excess, and my motivation’s triggered once more.

I’m going through one of those horrible phases where things aren’t half bad. I have a bit more money in the bank than I used to, my car is running, I don’t own anyone anything, work is trundling along without incident. Nothing is happening. I’m bored senseless. Right now my life is comfortable and uneventful, which is a bit pathetic all things considered.

I did some maths too, and figured if I saved just £2 a day, I’d save what scientists call a metric fuckton of money. See, that’s actually less than what I’m paying getting my lunch from the work cafeteria, because I was lazy and didn’t make myself anything to eat before I left the house. Now, over the course of a five day week, that’s a tenner. Over a month, forty quid. Over a year, £480. Holy fuck man, I’m spending nearly half a grand on shit processed tepid food I don’t even like! That’s a few ounces of weed, nearly a ton of tabs of acid, 190 or pints of beer, a rollicking good evening with a lady (or two) of the night, or enough petrol to drive through France to Zürich, down to Monaco, and drive the coast to Malaga, with enough left over for a celebratory drink once you got there. Or the gym membership that I was actually trying to budget for in the first place.

As you might be able to tell, things have fallen by the wayside fitness-wise over the past three months or so. Still not having bread, but that’s been replaced with whatever shit is on offer at work that day, normally meat wrapped in pastry with a side of mediocre chips. It doesn’t taste that good, but it fills a hole well enough that I’m not more grumpy with hunger. My shifts have been straddling that line between starting too early to do anything, and finishing too late to do anything. By which I mean I can’t go walking in the woods with my dog in the dark without seeming like a nutter. Though now I think of it, wouldn’t that make the people judging me nutters too? In either case, I’ve fell off the wagon, and I’m wanting to get back on it. Already the diet has improved, I’ve got a couple of joints worth of weed left then I’m done with that (and subsequently smoking altogether) until at least a hot summer’s day months from now, and I’m already feeling a bit lighter and better as a result.

Two big things have triggered this: firstly, the people I work with. Not the stereotypical shut-ins you might think work in tech, but not exactly a crowd of Olympians either. They’ve got what I’ve come to think of as the “IT Physique.” Few are obese, but most are walking around with soft, shapeless bodies, with little pot bellies and ridiculously skinny arms because that’s the only part of their body that moves with any frequency. Some have really bad hunches from using computers for so long, and I’ve started to notice myself slouching in my seat, my spine all curved, and I really don’t want to end up like them. Secondly, Phill, the big fat guy I used to go to college with, has started losing the beef at a rate of knots, and annoys me that I haven’t been the one to do it first. Given he’d always been that way and I used to play sports six days out of seven, I kinda have to belittle his achievement by going one better, and beating him at every possible thing in the world. Infantile I know, but it has to be done man.

Nanu nanu.